But you don't look sick...

In my first post I mostly rambled and ended it by telling a couple of this symptoms...

 I talked about fatigue and pain. I didn't even touch on the hair loss, weight gain/loss, the side effects of our medication, the memory loss, the headaches... it really just keeps going.
"But you don't look sick," That seems to be the number one thing us lupies hear. Oh, we look perfectly fine on the outside, there is no way our body is fighting it's self on the inside, that's just silly.
Well it is. Lupus is an autoimmune disease. They're different types of Lupus but it all boils down to one thing... our immune system is a little confused. No, it's not like aids, I hear that alot too. With aids the immune system is UNDER productive. With Lupus it is OVER productive.
You know what antibodies are, right? They fight away all the bad stuff that enters our bodies. Well people with Lupus have formed auto-antibodies. They go around attacking...us. Our organs, everything can be affected.
So, while I may look like a regular, pale, slightly chubby 20 year old female on the outside, trust me. I am sick.
I've heard people say, "Well, at least you don't have cancer." They're right. Thank God. But just because I don't have cancer doesn't mean I'm okay. It seems people view cancer as the worst thing ever and anyone that doesn't have it has no right to complain. I'm not denying that cancer is terrible, in no way am I saying that. I feel for the people who go through it, whether themselves or a loved one. What I mean is you can't really pit those two awful diseases against each other. That's like saying you have a broken foot, but at least you don't have a broken hand.
My point is, I'm sick. I don't like to think of myself as that way. Maybe it's denial. Some days I might feel okay for a little while and I don't even think about it. Most days it's all I can think about.
But I mostly like to think of myself as a person... a person that has to remember to limit themselves. A person that has to remember to put on sunscreen. A person that has to walk around with an umberella and sleeves while everyone else is in tanks and shorts, basking in the son. A person who loves rainy days because of the shade and cooler air, but hates them because of the joint pain it causes. (Yes I believe the weather messes with my arthritis, if you don't believe me then you don't have arthritis.)
I don't know where I was going with this. I kind of went everywhere with this one. I need to learn something about structure. (: